That's What He Said

nudawn: tylercoates: absurdlakefront:thereisnowhy: “Chocolate...

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:44:27 -0500

tylercoates:

absurdlakefront:thereisnowhy:

“Chocolate Bunny Deaths”

Bonus points for using the theme song from Palindromes, written by Nathan Larson and featuring the “la la”s of Nina Persson.

It’s like, Easter: A Film by Todd Solondz!

you guys this is actually quite beautiful, and funny and sad!!!

the blowdrier was the best one!!

Absolutely wonderful and surreal. Jonathan Safran Foer’s Everything is Illuminated kept running through my mind, but that’s just me.

Guts

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 16:48:51 -0500

adeandabet:

peterwknox:

All this ‘sudden’ discovery of the Palahniuk short story ‘Guts’ is lame. Predictably, parents would object to it being assigned in high school English, but it’s been out for almost 6 years, and included in his novel Haunted. Chuck even used to read it aloud for groups.

But even better than the actual short story, is Chuck’s essay ‘The Guts Effect’ in which he discusses why he stopped doing it at readings. Because people were passing out. 67 people actually. And that essay is terrific, well written, and illustrates the power of storytelling.

A year and a half ago, a NY girl was reading the story on the subway platform, waiting for the L train to come, and passed out just from reading it. Her blog post about it is awesome and worth reading as well.

Overrated story - it’s not even that well written. It’s shock short-story - the literary equivalent of “Rescue 911!” or “Craziest Police Moments Caught On Film”

I am actually in the middle of Haunted right now and I’ll admit, “Guts” gave me a woozy feeling for a second. It is not for the lighthearted. And it isn’t even the main plot point of the story that I found to be the most disturbing.

I disagree with the above. I think it is pretty excellently written and to compare it to dramatization shows that barely show the moments is an insult. Palahniuk’s style is so powerful especially when read aloud because of the visceral details and power of his writing. I’m a huge fan, and I hope the rest of Haunted is as powerful.

zombienovela: The Vinn Diagram

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 16:29:31 -0500

zombienovela:

The Vinn Diagram

I found a LiveJournal where a fat girl is writing fanfiction where Nikki Blonsky and Zac Efron are madly in love.

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:45:59 -0500

mykicks:

I’m skipping all the ones that aren’t rated “XXX” because that’s just how I roll.

“He did as he was told, Nikki pulling down his boxers like he had her panties. She crawled her way back up feeling his hard muscles under her fingers, using her nails to cause Goosebumps to appear on his skin.”

I don’t know why “Goosebumps” is capitalized. I can only assume books of R.L. Stine’s Goosebumps series are appearing on his skin.

Btw, this girl posted a YouTube video where she sings. She looks exactly how you’d expect someone who writes Blofron erotica to look.

When I accidentally burst out laughing during a lecture in “Selected Jewish Topics,” you know that post is goin up.

tumbledore: Drug deaths vs mentions in the popular press. Is...

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:23:01 -0500

tumbledore:

Drug deaths vs mentions in the popular press. Is this the result of or responsible for our absurd drug laws?

Missed this when it first went around. Really interesting, but misleading to try and compare this is our US drugs laws when this is a graph of statistics from the UK. I don’t know enough about their laws to connect the two (I mean, their cops don’t even have guns, right?) But I’d like to see this graph with US numbers. Anybody seen one?

Another Reason [Not] to Get Excited for Battleship

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:16:10 -0500

Another Reason [Not] to Get Excited for Battleship:

mcdavis:

indieandyy:

The big bad in Battleship won’t be Nazis, reverse vampires, or ominous looking pegs. Instead, it’s aliens.

What we’re getting is a film adaptation of a Hasbro board game, and just like this year’s G.I. Joe, we can probably expect it to be big, dumb, and stupid. Except this time around there won’t be a veil of nostalgia surrounding the “characters” (unless someone is really fond of their Destroyer) to make the suck apparent.

(via /film)

—
I had no idea there was a Battleship movie in the works until now… but I immediately decline.

Peter Berg’s looking to follow up his last movie (Hancock) with a movie that will likely be panned even worse. At least Hancock banked for the studio. This will probably sink.

Emphasis mine. Reblogged solely for pun-highlighting purposes.

peterwknox: Support for Same-Sex Marriage by Age and...

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:06:12 -0500

peterwknox:

Support for Same-Sex Marriage by Age and State » Sociological Images

via

All I learned from this is that there is no point trying to change old people.

Gawker Questionnaire: Are You A Jew?

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 23:50:00 -0500

Gawker Questionnaire: Are You A Jew?:

fek:

So, how’d you score? Any Orthodox Jews in the house? How’d you do?

Oh I scored a Woody Allen, but with payos. I just wanted to bring a little Orthodox opinion to the topic.

Of course Gawker and many “Media Jews” (my term, patent pending) would take issue with this Orthodox school in London denying admittance to a student with a progressive conversion. I mean to so many people, Nazi’s included, if you got any Jewish blood, that makes you a Jew (thank God those national socialists were so liberal, right?). As Foster puts it:

In the great literature of our time, Harry Potter, people without two magical parents are considered by evil angry purebred magical people to be “Mudbloods.” This is kind of like that.

However, according to Orthodox Judaism, that is not at all the case. It is contigent solely on the mother’s Judaism whether the child will be considered a Jew from birth. It really is a crazy law, especially when you consider how many movements there have been in recent years decrying the oppresion of women in Judaism. But if you think about it, no one has more power in Judaism that the mother (as any Jewish son and he’ll be quick to tell you that much). It is solely within the woman’s power to determine the Jewishness of the next generation.

You can harp on these practices all you want, and you may even have a point (I think it’s clear that you do), but these sorts of situations within the Orthodox community are not changing anytime soon. Probably never at all. At least I’m not gonna be the one to face all those mothers. I got Jewish mothers of my own.

"Bigger than Hitler!"

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 16:35:36 -0500

“Bigger than Hitler!”

- The random Austrian dude who asked us directions last night when the stupid comments back and forth led inadvertently to the question: “So you’re a big in Austria?”

To remind readers, Freud was Austrian. So is Arnold Schwarzenegger. So are all these fuckin people.

This guy is a big deal I guess.

NSFW: After Fort Hood, another example of how ‘citizen journalists’ can’t handle the truth

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 16:26:21 -0500

NSFW: After Fort Hood, another example of how ‘citizen journalists’ can’t handle the truth :

winstonwolfe:

andrearosen:

mikehudack:

Read this.

“There surely can’t be a human being left in the civilised world who doesn’t know that cellphones must be switched off in hospitals, and yet not only did [Tearah] Moore leave hers on but she actually used it to photograph patients, and broadcast the images to the world. Just think about that for a second. Rather than offering to help the wounded, or getting the hell out of the way of those trying to do their jobs, Moore actually pointed a cell-phone at a wounded soldier, uploaded it to twitpic and added a caption saying that the victim ‘got shot in the balls’.”

Real journalists may decry this unsolicited citizen journalism, but too many are enablers—using amateurs’ mangled, irresponsible reports and buying their exclusive footage and images for real publications. People don’t turn to their cameraphone because they’re share-happy egotists, they do it because the actual press has an appetite for what they’re releasing, and, sometimes, will even pay for it.

I want to preface my comments by saying I have not read the article yet, though I will soon. And of course, amateur journalism that does not check its sources or facts before being picked up my the mainstream media and propogated as absolute certainty is ridiculous and dangerous. Likewise is someone who gets in the way of people who actually are trying to help others.

That being said, the above comments about how the cellphone photographer neglected to offer to help the injured I believe is out of place. Most photographers do not offer to help the people around them, even if they are in the worst types of situations. Pictures you see of people suffering after a terrorist attack, for instance, are only possible because the photographer is standing there, Nikon in hand, to capture the shot, not to influence it. That is not to say that photographers are cold-hearted. Many in fact are very active in charity and are just as likely as the rest of us to help those in need.

However, when a cameraman, amateur or otherwise is taking a picture, it is not his/her place to jump into the shot and help the person out. That is not what they are there to do. They are there to capture those moments and tell the story so that all the rest of us can gaze at what life really looks like, whether is it high-resolution and dynamically lit, or if it is grainy and over-exposed. To say that someone is being irresponsible in capturing pictures and twittering about them inanely is one thing, especially when that person is a US soldier who certainly had other responsibilities. But to harp on one person’s choice of capturing anguish instead of elevating it when thousands of respected and acclaimed photographer do just that seems a bit excessive.

natashavc: Dick Towel. It Works!

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 01:10:59 -0500

natashavc:

Dick Towel.

It Works!

I didn't hear a thing!

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 00:38:20 -0500

Is your cat making Too Much NOISE all the time?

Is your cat constantly stomping around, driving you crazy?

is your cat clawing at your furnitures?

Think there’s no answer?

You’re so stupid!

Firefox add-on puts "dislike" option on Facebook posts

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 23:13:25 -0500

Firefox add-on puts "dislike" option on Facebook posts:

cvxn:

Other people have to install it to be able to see it, so get on it, everybody!

Sweet

The Morning After You stay classy, New York.

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:58:47 -0500

The Morning After

You stay classy, New York.

Big Fuckin Deal.

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 00:43:33 -0500

datny:

markyb:

Everyone go to bed now…please?

its too bad the tigers arent noteworthy, huh.

Oh, that is cold.

Twist the knife, why don’t you?

Big Fuckin Deal.

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 00:14:37 -0500

Everyone go to bed now…please?

Yes We Can: Postmodern edition.

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 14:31:19 -0500

Yes We Can: Postmodern edition.:

Your Chia Obama is a symbol of Liberty, Opportunity, Prosperity, and Hope

blakeley: snapalicious: themattsmith: Oh my god, you guys…....

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 17:29:41 -0400

blakeley:

snapalicious:

themattsmith:

Oh my god, you guys…. just… I… no words…

Best thing on the internet today.

Amazing.

Kah-doooz to you sir.

Serious skillz in effect here.

I didn’t even watch this with sound yet, but this is most certainly goin up.

carlovely: correct.

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 14:27:06 -0400

carlovely:

correct.

slippy: BREAKING: COMMUNISTS INVADE DETROIT, SET UP POLICE...

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 19:16:08 -0400

slippy:

BREAKING: COMMUNISTS INVADE DETROIT, SET UP POLICE STATE WITH LOTS OF PRETTY, LUSH RED BANNERS

Or are they just props for the new Red Dawn movie that’s currently shooting there? I dunno, whatevs. More pics here. You can also follow the shoot on Twitter. The movie stars Tom Cruise’s son.

Well, we have had a problem with local government. This can’t be that bad.